Do You Wonder?

        What if something else happened instead of what really occurred? Do you wonder? My mind is full of 'what if.' What could have been, but will never be. 

        Do you think of someone and they bring a smile to your face, or do you think of them and a tear falls from your eye? 

        I wonder what someone is doing, but then a part of me... Honestly could careless. Yet... A small part of my heart wishes to know. I know it will not happen because of things that transpired, but I wish things were different. Do you feel the same?

        Does your heart ache or has it found peace? If it is peaceful... Would you share your path? If your soul is unsettled... If it has not found its peace... Will you share it? 

        What is your catharsis? Do you paint, or draw? Do you write, or do you sing? Do you dance, or do you read? Do you drive, or do you meditate? Do you walk, or do you run? Do you watch something, or do you act? Do you hide, or do you get out there? Do you push it down, or do you set it free?

It's Happening!

            It's happening! It is time!

            The go ahead has been given and the book is now available!

            I am terrified, but also extremely excited. It is available in either a paperback, or a hardcover copy. I am currently working on getting an electronic version of the book up, but there have been a few set backs in getting it up. Turns out that it is a bit more difficult than I expected. When it is finished, I will upload a link for that as well.

            If you have any questions, please let me know! I hope you enjoy it.

https://m.barnesandnoble.com/w/the-fade-sigyn-draven/1139873662

Music

         There are mentions of music inside the book. I list some songs, and some artists. I believe that music is important. At least for me it is. It is something that I love to immerse myself in. 

         I am always open to listening to new music. I probably know of more bands/artists than any one person should know. From those that are popular around the world, to the ones that are just above the surface on the internet. 

         A few years ago I started a list of every one that I've listened to at some point in my life. Maybe I will upload some of them one day. 

        I do mention one of my absolute favorites since I was a teenager in the book. I have a lot of favorites, but this band is one that I have loved for what feels like forever. It is Motionless In White. They are a heavy metal band, so if you are not into that then fair warning, but give them a chance. You may like it. It is always good to try new things... Try it at least once, and if you don't like it then that is okay. 

        You are not going to like everything, or agree with everyone. That is okay. It is important to know that it is okay to be different. Being different is what make you well... You. 

        If you have a favorite, please feel free to drop it in the comments. Give me some suggestions. Give me some of your favorite songs. Let's share.

        Here are a few of mine. And yes, I am fully aware I have a strange taste in music. I don't know if I can narrow it down to one genre. I do kind of lean more towards rock music. Though I can go from listening to Motionless In white to Frank Sinatra. I can go from Conan Gray to Volbeat. SayWeCanFly to Billy Raffoul. Harry Styles to Misfits. Fleetwood Mac to Frank Ocean. David Bowie to Green Day. My Chemical Romance to M83. Bleeding Through to Alexander 23. Rihanna to The Used. Hank Williams to Alice In Chains. Pitbull to AFI. Slipknot to Ed Sheeran. Ekoh to Tokio Hotel. Avalon Landing to Bon Iver. Cigarettes After Sex to Falling In Reverse. Elvis Presley to Rob Zombie. Johnny Cash to 5 Seconds Of Summer.

        Please trust me when I say that isn't even half of it. But hey... Now you may, or may not, have some artists to listen to 😅

        I hope you have a beautiful day! Try something new :)     <3

Little Snippet. Part 1

       Here is a small snippet from The Fade. 

       Onyx Eyes 

Emotions that swirl around

Overlapping each other 

In the dark caress of 

His onyx eyes

They are the deepest shade

Of the richest earth

Like his eyes were

Made out of the

Atoms born from

Brilliant stars

She could feel

His eyes drilling 

Into her own

She had never seen

Eyes like his

Eyes with so much darkness

 

Yet filled to the brim with

Light behind them

Endless depths of ink...

Like she was trapped in

An eternal spell

Of the midnight sky

About The Fade

        This book is very dear to me. It makes me feel very vulnerable, but I suppose that is a good thing. It makes it real. A lot of the experiences in it are mine, and some come from dreams as I explain in some of the stories. It is both fact, and fiction.

        I have spent so much time editing it, and rereading it over and over until my mind turned into mush. Self publishing is hard, and having to learn all about how to even get started... It was and is a long process. Making sure that everything is done correctly, and combing through it all...

        I hope it is good. I believe it is.

        I didn't want to ask for help. I wanted to do it all myself. Perhaps it was my pride that took control. Thinking that if I am going to do something like this, then it will be on my terms. It will be my mistakes. My spelling errors. My editing. My everything. 

        I didn't want anyone else to touch it. I didn't want someone to look at it and make changes. It is written the way it needed to be. Flaws and all. Though I did try to fix them all... I am sure there are a few that are stuck inside somewhere. 

        This book and if I have any that follow... They are characters that are torn apart at the seams. They are full of joy, and pain. They are happy beyond belief, and yet laden with heartache.

        I am thankful for the support of my sisters throughout this process. I am thankful for their encouragement through the times when I needed someone most, and when it felt like I had absolutely no one to turn to. No one that could anchor me down. I hope they see how much they mean to me. I greatly appreciate them and hope they know how much I love them. 

        Thank you for listening... Technically reading. Thank you for reading my little rant. I hope you have a wonderful night and a beautiful day, Darling.

The Fade

            The title of my book. It was one that stuck in my head for days. Those days turned into weeks, and then into months. I slapped it on a background I created and added my name. Then... BAM. I made a book cover!

            Now what? 

            Well my dears... That wasn't even the beginning. Do you want to know where it all started? And how this came to be?

             It started many years ago. I have always loved writing since I was a kid. I wrote poetry, or what I thought was poetry. I would write lyrics for songs that I thought I would one day create. Although I don't believe that I have a great singing voice. When I was in middle school ages ago, I thought that I would be in a band. I focused on it for years, and I wrote so much for it. It never happened though. I was not confident enough to pursue it. I kept my work hidden. Kept it a secret. There were very few that I actually trusted with anything that I wrote.

            In high school things were a bit different. I moved a lot during my freshman year, and that gave me several experiences. It was kind of funny... Everyone has the same drama everywhere. The only thing that is different is the names of the people and their faces. You see a lot of love, and a lot of heartache. You see joy and anger. You see relationships start and you see them crumble. You see those that are faithful and those that are not. It does not matter where you are. The drama and the problems you are going through... Someone is going through that same shit. 

            I'm sorry to say, but it's kinda the same when you're an adult too. You will have coworkers that you can't stand, and some that you absolutely adore. There is a song by Bowling For Soup called High School Never Ends. Honestly... If you think about it... It is kinda true.

            "The whole damn world is just as obsessed with whose the best dressed and whose having sex. Whose got the money? Who gets the honeys? Whose kinda cute, and whose just a mess? And you still don't have the right look. And you don't have the right friends. Nothing changes but the faces, the names, and the trends. High school never ends."   

            Alright. Lets get back on track. 

            I do not claim to be an expert in anything and I cannot guarantee that I will be able to give you the best advice you could ever get. I can only share the things that I have been through. I can tell you how I handled it. I can share my stories. I can listen to yours, and be metaphoric shoulder to lean on since I can't actually be physically by your side. 

            As time progresses... I hope that you won't feel so alone. I hope that this reaches you in some way. That you can see that we are all just flowers in this giant ass garden we call life. So my dear, give yourself some water. Take a moment to soak in some sun. I can't say that everything will be okay, because things take time. It is always good to take little moments for yourself.

            Remember. It may be stormy now, but it can't rain forever.

Get The Ball Rolling

     So... Here I am, and here you are. This feels a bit awkward. A bit strange. I am unfamiliar with how this all works, and how to get the ball rolling. This is a new adventure for me, and I'd like to take you along for the ride. My name is Sigyn Draven. I am currently in the process of publishing a book through Barnes & Noble, and I am learning as I go.

   

    I have been writing for years, but I never thought that I would do anything like this. I figured that my stories would all stay locked up in this little mind of mine and I wouldn't allow them to shine. Though through the encouragement of close friends that I consider my sisters... My heart on the matter changed, so here I am. And I am going for it.

    

    I am a woman that is trying to figure life out. Isn't that what we are all doing? We all experience love, and heartache. We laugh, and we cry. The past few years, well life in general... It isn't easy. These stories that I have are mine. It is my life laid bare for you in hope that you can relate to it in some way. And perhaps you can also see how ridiculous I am as well. Hopefully it is in a good way too. I try my best. That is all any of us can do, right? This is my catharsis. This nervous, anxious, and depressed human that I am... That is just trying to do something that means something. So I would like, if I may, to take you on a journey with me. 

    This blog will be me delving deeper into the content within my book, and hopefully future ones. Thank you for stopping by. Let's keep meeting like this.